I don’t want to be the needy girl who needs a guy to make her happy. I don’t peg myself at that kind of person what so ever and I don’t know why i’ve fallen into that type. I’ve convinced myself that things will get better if there’s a guy there to text me late at night until I fall asleep and there to greet me when I wake up…but that’s not the case. Those things-relationships- are temporary and I don’t know why, but all of this is making sense now. I want to be that independent girl, who can provide herself with happiness and make a life of her own with out anyone’s help. Whenever I picture my future-like in 15 years-I never see myself with a guy. I always see myself alone, on my way to work and getting drinks with my friends on a Saturday night. But now, in my present I feel the need to have a guy with me, and I know it’s because I feel that that’s what’s missing. But it’s not. What’s missing is, me being completely me. I’m still in the process of finding myself, creating and molding who I want to be in the world and that’s why I feel like parts of me are missing, like i’m hollow in some aspects of my life. And i’m so fucking happy that i’ve come to realize this. Now, at this point is the time to be utterly adventurous and courageous in finding yourself and I’m stoked to go out and become whole.
